Really, I am attempting to get some interesting and relevant items up here for you to enjoy. The alphageek knows you come here for the great combination of wit, humor and information. Well, actually you come here because I begged, but please try to humor me. I thought you could use a tip for getting ready for Thanksgiving. This tip is a tip that would be good anytime, anyplace, but it happens to be really good for Thanksgiving.

Turkey: everybody will have some in the upcoming weeks. Most turkey served is really dry. The shame is, turkey does not have to be that way. Turkey is best when cooked to temperature. There is my big tip.

So, why the meat thermometer title? The best way to cook a turkey is to use a thermometer and measure the temperature. Once I learned to use a meat thermometer, my cooking skills increased exponentially. I was able to go from dry, nobody wanted it turkey, to the variation of the iron chef that I am today. Now, I use a meat thermometer almost every time I cook meat. The single best step I have taken is the meat thermometer.

So what temperature to cook to? Look that up. In this case, google is your friend. Below are the steps that you will only find here.

1) Take that stupid pop up thing, pull it out and throw it away. You will destroy your turkey otherwise.
2) Use the package to calculate the time to cook your bird, according to weight.
3) DON"T COOK THE TURKEY AS LONG AS STEP 2!
4) Begin to measure the turkey about half the time suggested in step 2. As the turkey gets close to temperature, it will start to heat up more quickly, so don't be afraid to check more frequently.
5) Don't go over the suggested temperature that you found in your google search.

There are a lot of techniques out there to cook a turkey be separating the light and dark meat. Those techniques are for folks trying to make the best turkey ever. If you are like me and trying to make turkey that does not need to be covered up with gravy to hide the fact that you dried out the turkey, just follow the advice here today, or don't and listen to another year of whining. It really is your choice. I can tell you your friends and family will rave about a properly cooked bird.

To be certain you are cooking the turkey to the temperature you found in your google search, make sure you check both the light and dark meat. The breast will heat up more quickly.

I have found by measuring the time is cut in about half over that stupid pop up thing. The time varies for a lot of reasons, and I won't go into them unless there are requests. Geeks have found that people just roll their eyes if given too much information. I do that sort of stuff so you don't have to. You are welcome.

We have been writing a lot of restaurant reviews lately. After all, the reviews are what get people to the site. They could come for the witty and humorous insight into all things food, but massive numbers of readers is not yet happening. I asked a friend why he did not read much, and he said it was because he read slowly. He also pointed out that there are not enough non-food review items to keep his interest, because he lives far away from the location of most of the reviews. We are going to try write some new items up for you. There is an extensive list of geek centered articles that are going to be written, and the articles should provide a means to show off the wit you have come to love.

Today, we are going to show off the smoker results here. Using the smoke is one of those "big deal" projects here. The thing has to actually be clean before you put food in the smoke. The food has to be prepared properly, and then the smoker has to be cleaned after use. We make no claim to making great food in the smoker. After all, smoking is the kind of thing that cause people to use pistols at forty paces and other such things. We pretty much rub the meat in some sort of dry rub, put the meat in the smoker, add some wood chips (the smoker is an electric smoker) and let time take care of the rest.

Mrs. Alphageek brought home the jowls of a pig that won the Louisa County 4H contest at the county fair. At leas, that is what she told me. We took the jowls, and let the jowls sit in the freezer for months. About a year later, we realized we were going to get cuts from the next year's winner, so we needed to clear last year's winner out of the freezer. We used a basic rub, and tied the ends up, to help cook the jowls more uniformly.

Pork Jowls (click to enlarge)

Through the magic of the internet and pictures, you can see the results below.

Smoked Pork Jowls (click to enlarge)

Think of this cut as a really good tenderloin. The meat just melted away in the mouth, sort of like a milkshake that is gone all too quickly. The small cut allows for more smoke flavor to come through, without getting overcooked. The magic of the meat thermometer comes through again.

We were inspired to try this cut because of the original Iron Chef. That would be the Iron Chef that was filmed in Japan, with the great voice overs and the Real Chairman. On a particular episode, one chef mentions that the tuna's best meat is on the cheek, because the cheek does not get over worked while the fish swims. We thought that could apply to the pig too. Smoking this pig jowl made for a great experiment that everyone should try and we loved the results. What have you smoked? Why not leave some feedback and let us know.